Hello everyone and thanks for reading this post. Its been a couple of weeks whilst we have had a well earned break in Business Connections Towers!
Today I would like to share three really important lessons I have learnt this week. They touch on the following areas: Networking , Social Media and Communication.
1) NETWORKING : I’m an active member of BNI, Entrepreneurs Circle and 4N and a Chamber of Commerce. I’m also a Regional Director for BNI London North West and very proud and priveleged to hold the role that I do. This week I have learnt the lesson that in Networking, you can’t please and be best friends with absolutely everyone.
The thing about great networking is that it brings a structured and accountability based approach to making new contacts and seeking out business. However the very WORD entrepreneur sometimes clashes with this theory. I mean, didn’t we all go into business to not be told what to do or have a boss?
This means that a diverse, reputable and amazing group of people in the same room, don’t 
always see eye to eye. I have also realised that this is OK because in life that happens a lot.
However the time when this becomes dangerous is when there is a lack of
2) COMMUNICATION: In the words of Bo Bennett
Communication is about being effective, not always about being proper. “
Communication, I believe is based hugely on values. Lets look at it this way.
If I say I am happy – every single one of you will read it differently based on YOUR interpretation of Happy. Based on our lives and events in our lives we will all have different beliefs of happy.
So what does this mean? Well, the good news is that you don’t need to take lessons in mind reading, BUT what it does mean is showing mutual respect for each others opinions and most importantly, something I allowed myself to forget, looking from the OTHER persons perspective.
Did I give you an off glance, REALLY? What facts do you have to back it up? Have we fallen out? Is there an issue Or has something similar happened before?
Did you speak to me sharply? REALLY? Or have I placed my own values on something which was meant innocently and actually this is how you speak?
The great thing about networking is that you get to know people, like them and build relationships with them. Poor communication breaks those relationships faster than a bolt of lightening and can take a long time to build up.
What I have learnt is that sometimes, communication goes wrong. Never be afraid to apologise and start again, and if you hear something which doesn’t sound right, don’t jump to conclusions. Try and work out WHY the other person may have said or did what they did.
If you are all on the same side, but also very good business people, is it POSSIBLE that you just have different ways of communicating?
This brings me to my third learning
3) SOCIAL MEDIA and WOW what a learning curve on this one. Even in my business I sometimes completely miss something and in the last two weeks BOY did I miss something really important.
I have learnt this week to be very aware of the words I use on Social Media but also not to be too aware of this?
OK that sounds crazy but here’s what I mean.
I have a total of nearing 6000 contacts across my social media activities. Some people know me and others don’t. Now what happens if I write:
“ Had a crazy day and one particular incident completely ASTOUNDED me today… can’t believe it – this CHANGES everything”
The people who don’t know me think – WOW she has had something BIG happen today and will see this as good or bad depending on their own experiences of life and businesses
Some acquaintances may ask- COME ON tell us then?
My Friends or clients who are in regular contact with me may ask if the business is OK – am I OK?
My Business or Life partner could read this as - UH OH ! or – OK she has a great surprise for me.
But what about the friend or colleague who reads this and see’s it as a dig because you had cross words. What about that client who just hung up on youbecause you had a hard conversation. I will always remember about three years ago I was looking after a BNI chapter in East Anglia and I had a conversation with one of the leadership team and we couldn’t reach an agreement.
The very moment I got into the car I received another call on a business matter where there was a delay. I updated my facebook page about a “delay and getting sorted out” and within minutes I had an irate colleague calling me asking why I was being like that.
We had the conversation and once I had explained and realised how it must look, we were OK Remember – she never knew I had taken a call since seeing her that morning. How could she NOT see it any other way?
The closer people are to you, the more possibility there is they can see messages which aren’t intended that way – and therefore my learning is to be cautious of what you write but to KNOW that if someone cares enough or wants to hear the answer they ask. Also if you see something that you think is aimed at you ask yourself REALLY??? Seriously is it about you FOR SURE?? Does the writer know whats going on in your world??
You can’t always forsee what others will do or say and worrying about it will make it worse. So my tip for today is – be yourself, understand that not everyone will work with you, like you or understand you but that’s not your fault or even theirs. Its just the way people, and especially motivated entrepreneurs are.
Have a great day….
